24 while 25

I drive home in the rushing flakes of yet another snowfall on the stretch of highway where nobody passes and nobody approaches. At 55 mph, I let go of the wheel. Let the car drive itself.

...



28: Gondwana, "El Baile de Los Que Sobran." (Originally done by Los Prisioneros, in case you were interested.)
29: Kenny Chesney, "Out Last Night."
30: Jason Aldean, "My Kinda Party."

(A developing theme?)

solitude (the night inside me).

Last night I listened to old and beautiful music, and the times came back so fresh that I shut it off. Not a night for nostalgia, for this oneness.

But when I thought enough about those times, wasn't I always pedaling away, missing something, partially present? Haven't I always ached? Maybe it's not a feeling that can be chased off but one to carry, from this age to the next, from here to there, them to me and back to them. A part of me.

...

Vingt-Sept: Martin Solveig Et Dragonette, "Hello"

Phoenix

You find a way to keep the fire burning in a blizzard.

...

Twenty-six: "La La Lie," Jack's Mannequin (I hope Rachel attempts to like this post, too).

Out of the circle and onto the beam

Me, for the third time: "Everyone start over."
Young Level 3: "I CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE."

The Winner's Circle

still feels pretty fantastic for Coach two days later.

I hope it reverberates for them, that kind of applause.

This makes me want to write an essay, as usual.

..

Oye! Where was I?

23: Van Halen, "Why Can't This Be Love"
24: Velvet Underground, "Pale Blue Eyes"
25: Ingrid Michaelson, "Everybody"

x 4

I'm pretty ecstatic about the performances of our youngest ladies today. 1st vault, 1st and 2nd bars, 1st and 2nd floor, 2nd all-around, 2nd team. Lots of places in between. One legit trophy. YES.

To soothe you tonight, here's a lovely little piece that apparently came with my computer (as per the YouTube commenters, they've had a similar experience):

Veintidos: Bob Acri, "Sleep Away."

Well-slept Friday

My selves lie all over the floor. Teacher is curled under Runner, Coach flipped over beside On the Town, Netherlands Meets U.S. reaches one arm above School Spirit.

The question is not which of you will I inhabit today? but how many of you? I am no stranger to costume changes. New self, take your place, lights up, action.

*

Yesterday (#20): "Basket Case," Sara Bareilles (as recommended to me by Rachel, bringing back fond memories of our mutual basket case times)

and

Today (#21): "River of Deceit," Mad Season.

Spiral sounds

are spinning faster.

..

In honor of, and from, the country station that just launched on the radio today in these parts:

Brad Paisley, "Then." (Note: It's a happy country song!)

Not so inevitable

(I can see that as a line from a tween song, if it's not already.)

I finished the short story and debated one line in particular, a line the woman says, thinking it was too obvious. It would induce an eye-rolling "Of course she'd say that."

But I left it in and sent it 'round. The Flo and the Laurel both mentioned the same line. "That was chilling," Laurel said. "Whoa," said Flo.

The line stays. Perhaps not so inevitable after all.

..

For the 18th day:
Cake: "The Distance."

And on your way out:

17: Defiance, Ohio: "Calling Old Friends."

Skyless

I feel her now, the beating of wings against wires
Metal cross-stitching becomes the single road.
She is all air.

Additional bedtime stories for Emeline

Our gal Laurel just started a blog, and she's filled with equal parts sass and wisdom. Check it out. :-)

...

I still can't get the Next to Normal soundtrack out of my head (nor do I have any need/want to do so), but for diversity's sake, here is:

1/16: Sex Pistols, "Anarchy in the U.K."

Light

Last night I went to see Next to Normal on Broadway, knowing only that it was a rock musical about mental illness. A strange combination, it seemed.

Well, it blew my mind.

I'm not the type to cry during books or movies, and it was pretty tough not to at this show. People around me were wiping their eyes. Talk about quaking the human heart.

Tonight's the last performance before it closes, but I've half a mind to see it on tour when it swings nearby in the spring/summer.

And so:

Fifteen: Next to Normal, "I Am the One." (Original Broadway cast -- not the same folks we saw last night, who were just as excellent.)

Less heavy highlights of the evening included Lena driving in reverse onto a sidewalk, CHIPOTLE, and me dashing from her car whilst at a red light, buying a soft pretzel, and jumping back in before the light turned. You know how I feel about soft pretzels.

All that I could pillage

This is what you do: you roll up your roots, call it a life.

..

For the 14th: "Pacing the Cage," Bruce Cockburn.

Seamless (Acting Out)

Best line from The Social Network: "I'm six-five, 220 pounds, and there are two of me."

...

Until the girl who plays the assistant at the law firm shows up, I'm buying into the story. Good writing, good acting, nice pace.

But this character's presence feels contrived. The acting is obvious. And now I'm saying, "Ah, she's a device, and she'll plant a zinger at the end to be 'profound.'" Now I remember that this is a movie.

That's how I feel about writing that works too hard to be "writerly." Showing off, making too much of too little.

WWWBYD? (What Would William Butler Yeats Do?)

"A line will take us hours maybe;

yet if it does not seem a moment's thought,

our stitching and unstitching has been naught."

...

Number Thirteen for Thursday the Thirteenth: Wanda Jackson, "Funnel of Love." (Thanks, Boo-sef!)

cognizant

The best part of snow: lying in the middle of the unplowed road, looking up, thinking this bed is better than sand.

...

Keeping it Zen on the twelfth day of music:

Vienna Teng, "Lullaby for a Stormy Night," and also, "Gravity."

And another note on eleventy-one:

You need a special kind of song on a day like 1.11.11.

So:

Day 11 (1/11): Exile, "I Wish For You." Watch it. Just for a moment. You won't be disappointed.

11:11 1/11/11

FIRST OFFICIAL POST ON THE NEW LAPTOP.

(Also, a day in which we honor Bilbo Baggins.)

Unstoppable, baby.

There will always be women in rubber!

You wear three shirts and the wind presses them against you the closer you come to the marsh reeds. Hood's tied at your neck but your forehead is bare against the cold.

You strategize. Staying in the sun means blinding light off the snow, more wind. Hills in shadows means you'll work up a sweat. So you turn for the darker places, make yourself warm, save those eyes.

--

I like entering the highway here. Nearly the end. Nothing but stars and headlights. I begin.

--

Lena: "Do you ever worry that while you're driving, one of your tires will fall off?"

--
By now, I'd bet that 90% of people have given up their New Year's resolutions. I go forth!

Day 9 (1/9): Bad Company, "Shooting Star"
Day 10 (1/10): Bebo Norman, "Nothing Without You"

orange walls are people watching

I can compete a beam routine in a noisy arena or a dead silent gymnasium with all eyes watching. I can speak to a crowd without anxiety. But singing? Ah, singing. You sly beast.

My last official singing-in-public was karaoke (Bad Flomance, anyone?) and Rock Band, in which I lost my voice and then contracted bronchitis. But we unlocked songs through my performance. That's what I call taking one for the team.

In the high school days I auditioned for musicals, fully aware that I'd be relegated to the chorus line. And that was fine. That meant I got to wear a fun costume, maybe dance a bit and earn a speaking line or two. But to earn my place in the background, I had to sing in front of all the hopefuls.

I'm a rock star behind the wheel: I'm wanted dead or alive in the center of the ring just like a circus, knowing that you could use somebodaaaaay (and after all, don't we all just want to dance with somebody)? But take away the radio and the confines, and you take away my voice. It drifts away. Turns into a high and nervous little thing, a pony stranded in a rain storm.

Last night, I decide that I will attempt to change my destiny.

I Google singing tips, find a karaoke version on YouTube, sing away. I imagine the orange walls are people watching. I spin around a bit, get all theatrical. It helps. Enough? I don't know. But I'll pretend.

--

Day 8 (1/8): Sonora Carruseles, "La Comay." Quite the contrast between the nerdy guys of the band and the...dancing women.

Whilst channeling my inner Broadway star:

On the 7th day: "Buenos Aires" from Evita

If not, winter

If I learned anything in college, it's how to quickly and efficiently swipe snow off of my car. How to roll down unplowed streets, how to handle the whiteout or the slip on ice, car helplessly weaving from side to side.

Ease off the gas, steer gently, continue to sing along to the radio without a hitch.

Keep going.

Feliz Dia de los Reyes!

(And a Merry Russian Orthodox Christmas, too.)

I feel energized at this hour. Things are making sense.

--
Day 6 (1/6): Harry Chapin, "*W*O*L*D*"

with a glacier's patience

THE LAPTOP HATH ARRIVED.

As soon as the FedEx man knocked, I ran to the door. You can say I was a little excited.

I'm afraid to handle it because it's so pristine. But as Lena noted, "You better enjoy it before it becomes obsolete in two months."

So I've taken care of the important parts, like changing my settings so that my icons swing into each other, playing with the different sounds, and experimenting with the webcam.

Let the new era begin!

--

Day 5 (1/5): Neko Case, "This Tornado Loves You." Now that's a title!

me sacudes

Day 4 (1/4): Juanes, "Yerbatero"
as well as another catchy piece, "Me Enamora," that I've heard before. It's fun, so here you go!

Any way you want it, that's the way you need it

Cheesy fries with ranch and hot sauce, a shared can of Pepsi, tied football games that are of no consequence to either of us, rain outside, light within.

--

Day 3 (1/3): Bob Dylan, "The Times They Are A-Changin'"

they let their wings down

A new year and a new project!

To augment my musical familiarity, I now take on the challenge: 365 days, 365 new (to me) songs.

Suggestions are welcome.

Day 1 (1/1): Bo Burnham, "Words, Words, Words"
Day 2 (1/2): Hungry Lucy, "Just Imagine"

What shall today bring?

Lending a Hand

Not for the first time, I started writing a short story that began mundanely and then turned really weird, really fast. Supernatural phenomena? Murderous mothers? No big deal.

Incidentally, I've also just finished Ann Cummins's Red Ant House (thanks, Flo!), which didn't hurt. I enjoy her structure: the ordinary, the interruption of something strange and frequently twisted, the ordinary now no longer in tact. I took it in. Immersion, if you will. We'll see where this story goes.

1.1.11

means that I have health insurance. Put your hands up!

In the past two years I've set forth reasonable resolutions and met them all, but one still evades me.

Not this year.

Indeed, this shall be the time, 2011, in which I run ten miles without pause.

I'll see you out there.